Hope you are all doing well and had a Happy Valentines Day! Jeff and I enjoyed a relaxing day at the beach, and it was so nice to rest and just “BE” with one another. And there was this adorable baby seal swimming with the surfers, who was quite entertaining.
The day of rest was quite needed as the quarter begins to pick up for Jeff. He is finishing midterms and on Monday starts a 2 week intensive class. I have been enjoying by kiddos and my class. We are aslo planning another trip to Georgia. (WHAT? yep! Did you have to double take?) Jeff has a week break at the end of March between quarters, and we will be back during that week. We want to meet with churches, supporters, friends, and family. Please let us know if you are interested in getting together, either one-on-one to hear about Romania, or to catch up on life. We would love to do that! We are also working on putting together 2 prayer/vision-casting/info gatherings too, so keep an eye out for that! We also want to thank everyone who prayed with us at the last prayer night. It was wonderful to hear about people in Romania and all over the U.S. joining in prayer.
It is hard to believe we are 6 1/2 months away from our launch date, September 1st. It is especially hard to believe since the financial side of support has been slower than our eager hearts desire, but we are confident and have God’s peace about his timing. It is hard when people lovingly share concern that it might not happen when we want it to. We understand that, but we also understand God is bigger than the amount of money we need to launch and be sustained there long term. For now, we will rest in His peace beyond all measure, and try to keep an open mind.
With the 6 1/2 month date approaching, we are so excited and amazed at how God continues to put the puzzle pieces together! But, …we are also experiencing a range of other emotions. I love that God made us with emotions and that Jesus has felt every one of them. We are going through a process in our minds and hearts as we prepare to move to another culture, invest in a new ministry, leave behind friends and family, and facing and re-imagining dreams from our past for dreams in a new future. Sometimes I feel that we have to put on a good and excited face all the time for supporters, family, churches, and even Romanians. We are excited but just as we are gaining…we are loosing things too. Just as much as we feel that loss, we understand family is beginning to feel it too. When we got married, I knew Romania and a life of missions was in our future, and I was/am excited about that; but growing up I always envisioned living near family, having our kids know their great grandparents, seeing nieces and nephews grow up, and having a stable job and home. I am now facing the reality that all of that may not happen and accepting that a different life from that is good too. Just different.
So why do I share this with you? I am not trying to be a gloomy cloud in this post. I want to be honest and transparent with you as you are on this journey with us. Don’t get me wrong, loss can be good. Christ had to loose his life in order for there to be redemption and resurrection. The psalms are filled with laments but the writer always remembers that God is supreme, Earth is not our home, and to praise Him. There will be
good great to come from this journey/adventure God is leading us on! I am just in a stage of this journey where the feeling of loss and grief are present along with the feelings of joy. And that is ok.
Why are you cast down, O my soul,
and why are you in turmoil within me?
Hope in God; for I shall again praise him,
my salvation and my God.
Psalms 42: 5
2 thoughts on “Loss and Happiness”
Thanks for the post :). You know you are right. I realize I haven’t moved out of the country or to an entirely different culture, but I have moved to three different places in less than a year- away from friends and family- forced to start over every time. And we never know when this pattern will be over. You may have those moments where you just want something familiar, but we will be praying for God to fill you with an overwhelming sense of purpose when you do. Thanks for what you’re doing and for making disciples! We love you two!
-Lindsay & Matt
Thanks Lindsay. I am sure you do feel this too through the uncertainty of moving so much. And it is great when our local christian community comes around us, but sometimes you just want a piece of “home.” It is nice that with technology we can connect in some way to family and friends that are not close. Hope yall survive the snow coming your way! Love you guys and praying for you!
Lauren and Jeff